Melon Dramatic

Long Winded Instructions

Uh oh. That cantaloupe that's been sitting on the counter for 2 days is probably ripe by now. You're gonna have to eat it really soon. You know how quickly these things can go south. You blink and suddenly the cantaloupe looks like a rotted, misshapen nightmare. There's no time to lose!

But it's not time for breakfast and this is really a breakfast food. This is quite the pickle we find ourselves in (actually we'll use the thing before it would get pickled, but I'm getting ahead of myself). How can we enjoy this nice ripe cantaloupe before it goes bad?

I think you saw the answer coming a mile away. That’s right, make a cantaloupe cucumber cocktail. Can’t get anything past you!

So here’s what you do. Dice up that melon before it ages into oblivion and make yourself some cantaloupe simple syrup. We’ll wait here while you do that.

…

All set? Good job. That syrup you just made looks great. I’m so proud of you!

Now we’ll need some thin slices of cucumber. This is pretty easy to do with a potato peeler. Get a few and select your 3 most attractive slices. Line a rocks glass with 2 of them in a neat little crisscross pattern. For bonus points, listen to Kris Kross and/or Christopher Cross while you do this. Now set aside your glass and 3rd cucumber slice for later.

The time has come to froth an egg white. Separate the white from the yolk. You can use the yolk to make a caesar salad later. For now, put the white in your shaker. You’ll want to dry shake the white (with nothing else in the shaker) until it gets good and frothy. You can speed things up by throwing in the whisk part of your strainer. That’ll help agitate things during shaking.

Now that you have a frothy egg white, add in ice and the rest of your ingredients: the gin and the melon syrup. Shake once more to mix and cool everything.

Add a fancy ice cube/ball to your glass and strain your drink. Your frothy egg white should form a foamy layer on top. That was some good frothing you did back there!

Now for the pastie resistance. Grab the fanciest toothpick you own and skewer a melon cube. Put that 3rd cucumber slice on there accordion style and bookend with another melon cube. Set that atop your creation. You’ve done it!

It might seem like tooting your own horn, but I recommend that you “ooo” and “ahh” at your drink and then take your first sip right as that final chorus of Sailing kicks into high gear.