Moscow Mule

Long Winded Instructions

Let me pose a hypothetical for you. I really want you to clear your mind of distractions and focus on this scenario. Tell the others around you to be quiet (harshly if necessary). Maybe just go into another room. Turn out the lights and put on your noise cancelling headphones. In fact, if you have a sensory depravation chamber, go ahead and slip into that thing. Ready?

Ok. Imagine that you have copper mugs. Give yourself some space to live with this new condition for a minute. Really let it seep in. Picture the benefits, the drawbacks, the sheer potential. Picture how different (or not) your life might be. Good?

Ok. Now, imagine that you have some limes. Not all that uncommon, right? But don’t forget that in this scenario you also have copper mugs. Changes things a bit doesn’t it? Again, think of the possibilities. Explore, in your mind’s eye, what that this new combination of items might present. The possibilities are endless! I just thought of 14 without even trying. You know how people are always saying not to overthink stuff? Well you should think the living crap out of this thing. Really go for it.

And while you think about that, also imagine that you have ginger beer. I know this is getting difficult now because with each new item in your hypothetical life, the options grow exponentially. Exponentials are very difficult for our brains to process. We are all linear thinkers because that’s how we’ve evolved. That’s what we needed to survive. But now, with this new mind puzzle, we’re forced to push the boundaries of what seems possible and accept the broad and unbound potential of these combinations.

But we’re still not done. Push yourself to add ice, simple syrup, vodka, and mint to your scenario. It’s truly mind boggling. It’s like trying to imagine all of the different lives we might lead in the multi-verse. Every choice and combination of choices we or others make represents another potential reality that we may inhabit. The very concept inspires awe, fear, reverence, and crushing agony. And so it is with our hypothetical lives with these simple objects in them. Sit for another moment, still, with the power of this realization.

But today, I want to focus on one possibility alone. It very well may represent the best possibility, the most optimistic possibility, the most hopeful possibility. Because you may view your glass as half full… of Moscow Mule. Because out of countless universes that you may inhabit, you find yourself with the right ingredients. You, the you of this fortunate confluence of limitless hypothetical events, could combine all of these items to create a delicious refreshing cocktail.

Now climb out of your sensory deprivation chamber and take a deep breath of good fortune because we’re going to make this thing right now!

Put that ice in your copper mug. Add your vodka. Imagine the limitless timelines starting to converge. Add lime juice, best squeezed from a fresh lime. See more potential outcomes melting away. Add ginger beer. Now stir it. With each rotation of your mixing spoon, you move closer to the utopian possibility of your Moscow Mule. Now add a lime wheel and some mint leaves for garnish.

That’s it. You’ve arrived. Sit for a moment and really savor this moment. Think of all the things that had to go right for you to… oh you already drank it, didn’t you? Ok that’s cool.